Is it possible to get a  reasonable sized 4WD SUV with outstanding safety without spending a fortune? The 2005 Honda CR-V (with 4WD) starts at around $21,200 and has received the highest possible 5 star ratings in the government's crash tests:

Vehicle Frontal Star Rating based on risk of head & chest injury Side Star Rating based on risk of chest injury Rollover Rating Driver Passenger Front Seat Rear Seat 2 wheel drive 4 wheel drive 2005 Honda CR-V w/SAB TBR TBR

Safety features include:

Vehicle Stability Assist: this detects oversteer or understeer in a turn and helps restore control

LATCH anchors for child seats

front airbags

front side airbags

side curtain airbags

anti lock brakes

All of this is standard on all CR-Vs.

The CR-V 4 WD LX gets a EPA rating of 22 city / 27 highway (respectible for an SUV).